tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-81024522420287573732024-02-19T02:11:25.424+00:00Manic MummyManic Mummyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09357463785561776972noreply@blogger.comBlogger39125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8102452242028757373.post-69289274129072527072012-09-06T22:05:00.000+01:002012-09-06T22:06:55.855+01:00The Gallery : Back to (home)school<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
Our first day offically homeschooling.</div>
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<br />Manic Mummyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09357463785561776972noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8102452242028757373.post-19743273098412447402012-09-06T21:59:00.000+01:002012-09-06T21:59:57.269+01:00Beginning of an adventureToday is the day that our eldest, had we decided to send her to school, would have started. As we are homeschooling we decided to mark the beginning of this adventure together by going to a park for a picnic and afternoon of fun. The sense of excitement in the girls was palpable, and the day was made even more special to them as we made the journey by bus. We had a fantastic day and i can't wait to continue on this adventure together.<br />
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Enjoying the picnic</div>
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Looking out for Daddy coming back</div>
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Playing at the park</div>
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With Daddy</div>
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Best friends</div>
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Is anybody watching me?</div>
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Manic Mummyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09357463785561776972noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8102452242028757373.post-70615317395212550052011-12-09T11:36:00.000+00:002011-12-09T11:52:36.482+00:00My Awesome Photo - Capturing a Moment<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I had just recieved my DSLR Camera for Christmas and managed to take this shot (pure fluke) at the begining of January. I adore this photo, because even though it isnt perfect, it really captures her essence and every time i see it, it makes me melt. It is extra special because it is one of only a few photos of her in her first year where she is not wearing her epilepsy helmet. I dont have that many pictures of Pudding Pop any camera/video equipment in her first year was used purely to capture footage of her fits and now she is that bit older she has decided that she would much prefer to be behind the camera than in front of it. </div>
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To check out other awesome photos head over too <a href="http://stickyfingers1.blogspot.com/2011/12/photo-gallery-my-awesome-photo.html" target="_blank">Sticky Fingers The Gallery</a> </div>Manic Mummyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09357463785561776972noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8102452242028757373.post-52399692711149907722011-09-24T11:57:00.002+01:002011-09-24T11:57:40.615+01:00How I am feeling...I am trapped in the back of my own mind. A tiny dark cell, from which I can peer forward and see through the eyes of my soulless body at the life I ‘live’. Though live is much too strong a word, exist would be more appropriate. This body goes through the motions, a hollow shell moving aimlessly from task to task pretending to feel, pretending to care. The darkness encompasses me, no one knows, no one can understand the black radiating pit of numbness and nothingness. As it grows bigger I forget me more. I can’t find my way out and the longer it lasts the desire to fight, the will to try is dampened and slowly lost.<br />
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I am a robot, I say mostly the right things at almost the right time. People mostly don’t notice the delay, or how quickly a smile fades as soon as their face turns. Vacant expression is attributed to tiredness, how quickly people assume when they don’t like, or want to deal with the truth.<br />
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My life is lived in pain, both physical pain and mental anguish. How is it when all else fades, pain can still remain. Yet I am numb to it, yes it hurts to do even the smallest task but the numbness has swallowed my caring. What is the point in taking anything to relieve the pain, it never completely goes and it always comes back as strong as ever. It is an unwinable battle and I have not the strength to fight it. Yet sometimes I long for more pain, it lets me know I am not yet dead to the world, that I can still feel something.<br />
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I am a failure to my family, I cannot do for them what I should, cannot be who I should and who they need me to be. They would be better without me, this is no life for them and I am already not the wife and mother they know. The person they truly want and need is no-longer here and I cannot find her for them. But I am not strong enough to walk away, and so I fail them regardless of what I do.<br />
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I am forgetting how to feel, how to be me. I am lost, with no discernable way out.Manic Mummyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09357463785561776972noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8102452242028757373.post-72555143169080116852011-08-30T17:16:00.003+01:002011-08-30T17:39:44.802+01:00Bra's<br />
I was doing some reading last night on the history and purpose of bras and was honestly quite surprised at what I found out.<br />
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My introduction into the world of bra wearing was probably pretty normal. I began to develop and my mum took me shopping (to BHS ) and bought me my first 2 bras. They were more crop tops than bras and at size 32 AA offered no real support. To me and probably my mum it was just what you did once you began to grow breasts.<br />
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After reading last night I discovered that bras are a CHOICE not a necessity. Maybe to the much larger breasted woman they offer some welcome support, but on the whole they do nothing but force our breasts into what we deem is the most desirable shape for the duration we wear it.<br />
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Studies into bra wearing and cancer have also shown that women who wear a bra for 24 hours a day and at a significantly higher risk of developing breast cancer, with underwired bras being the main culprits. As I understand it any toxins or chemicals we ingest are stored in our body fat tissue, breasts have a large amount of such tissue surrounding the milk ducts etc, the natural bounce and wiggle of breasts aids the lymph nodes in ridding the body of such toxins, wearing a bra that is too tight or cuts in reduces wiggle and bounce rendering the body unable to rid itself of these toxins as effectively, build up of toxins can cause cancer. So the bras themselves don't cause cancer but they can be the catalyst for it.<br />
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To be honest I'm not sure I want to wear something that could end up causing me to have cancer. I make decisions not to do other things (such as smoking) for many reasons one of which is that it can cause Cancer so why should I continue to wear something that could give me something I would go to great lengths to avoid.<br />
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Firstly I thought about my reasons for wearing a bra which consisted of -:<br />
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1. I do like my breasts to point forwards rather than towards my toes.<br />
2. I don't like my nipples being visible through my clothing.<br />
3. I'm not keen on how much they bounce when I run or jump ( because we all know how much I do that) as it can become uncomfortable.<br />
4. It keeps my nipples warm as I suffer from Reynaud's of the nipple.<br />
5. I feel it is socially unacceptable to go without a bra.<br />
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Thinking about all of these things I have decided to go for plain cotton non underwired bra, for when I am going out or doing exercise or generally feel uncomfortable doing without. The rest of the time I am leaning towards a cami style vest for warmth and the nipple visibility issue.<br />
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With regards to number 1. I am hoping that as my body adjusts to doing without the support it has grown used too the muscles/ligaments that support the breasts will get stronger and they will start to point forwards again. I am also hoping that it will encourage me to stand up straight more at this will also help with the directionality issue.<br />
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I'll keep you posted on how I go.Manic Mummyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09357463785561776972noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8102452242028757373.post-44541111343086223302011-08-22T19:12:00.000+01:002011-08-22T19:12:49.304+01:00Pick up your litter, other people doWhile i think i agree with the message this is conveying I just wasn't quite sure it's placement on the motorway was targeting the correct audience at the most opportune of moments.<br />
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Though to be honest I'm not completely sure what it is it is saying. Is it saying I should pick up my litter because other people pick up my litter? Thats not really conveying a good message as it would imply that it doesn't really matter whether I do it or not as someone else will always come along and clean up after me. Or is it saying that I should pick up my litter because other people pick up their own? This is a better message but is promoting a 'sheep' mentality that just because everyone else is doing it we should do it too, which I venomously appose. Why should I do something just because everyone else does it?<br />
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Surely a much better message would be 'pick up your litter, it's the right thing to do?' or is that to preachy for today's British citizens? Also whoever is placing these signs should consider their target audience, I personally don't see many litteres on the motorway. Maybe it would be better to stick to the more conventional 'speed kills' as it seems a little more relevent. Manic Mummyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09357463785561776972noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8102452242028757373.post-88300423946588753632011-08-16T21:23:00.002+01:002011-08-16T21:23:20.289+01:00I'm BackAfter a considerably long break I am back. These past few months have been very confusing time for me and I had to do a lot of soul searching and thinking about me reasons for why I was doing this. It has taken me a long time to decide, but I came to the conclusion that yes I do want to continue with this blog. The postings might not be everyday but I am going to try to make them fairly regular and hopefully that will help me stick to subjects I actually want to talk about rather than filling it with random ramblings of mediocre interest. I want this blog to actually mean something to me so that I actually want to continue with it rather than resenting it because I am struggling to find anything of interest to talk about every day.Manic Mummyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09357463785561776972noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8102452242028757373.post-75654944902845289802011-01-13T23:03:00.000+00:002011-01-13T23:03:20.392+00:00Computer troublesBeen having some computer troubles recently. As in mine up and died on me. Normal service will resume shortly hopefully.Manic Mummyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09357463785561776972noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8102452242028757373.post-16356568447254116922011-01-05T20:02:00.000+00:002011-01-05T20:02:27.139+00:00NightmaresI've not been sleeping so great for the past week or so, you know how it is. Your exhausted but when you actually get into bed you can't drop off and end up staring at the ceiling for hours thinking of better things you could be doing with your time.<br />
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Last night this was made worse by quite possibly the worst nightmare i have ever had. When i awoke from it i sobbed for a good hour, and anytime i have thought about it today it has set me off crying again. I warn anyone who is sensitive to use their judgement as to whether they wish to read the content of the dream. I know if it were someone elses i wouldn't want to read about it.<br />
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I dreamt that Munch had been naughty doing some trival toddler thing and had to be punished by the people without trial. She was behind a barrier and i wasn't aloud to get to her. They were planning on using like a dunking chair on her (so she would be sat about 8 foot in the air on a chair and when a lever was pushed it would tip, dropping her into a very deep vat of icy water) if she survived that it would be proof of her crime and she would then be beheaded. I could see all the equipment laid out in like an assembly line in the room behind the barrier, but she was being held in like an ante room at that point. I remember rushing to the cafe in the next room and argueing with the staff to let me use their phone, when they finally agreed i called a lawyer who was telling me that she shouldn't be punished witout a fair trial. At this point i was screaming at my hubby to go and tell them to not go through with it as the lawyer was demanding a trial. I was still on the phone when he came back and i asked where Munch was now. He replied that she was about to be dunked, i started screaming at him telling him he was supposed to be stopping them, but he said that they wouldn't behead her but he didn't see anything wrong with dunking. Hubbys mum who had appeared next to me was saying she'll be fine she can swim can't she? I started screaming and trying to get to the room while people were trying to restrain me while yelling 'STOP, she has to have a trial, she can't swim she will drown.' All the while terrified that she would either drown or they would go ahead and behead her anyway.<br />
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It's still upsetting me now, i'm just hoping it will fade with time. As it is i'm scared of going to sleep tonight incase i have another one. Normally i'm not one for nightmares but i just want a completely dreamless sleep tonight.Manic Mummyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09357463785561776972noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8102452242028757373.post-91795642741574187582011-01-02T19:33:00.000+00:002011-01-02T19:33:50.731+00:00Got a friend coming over tonightI've not really seen her for a while and the last time i did i had a killer migraine so not much fun was had. It will be good as she is coming here with her new partner and it will be nice to see her and get to know him before the big day later this month.<br />
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I'm trying to get as much quatlity time in as possible as she is moving back to the US after they are married and i haven't seen her much since we moved away from the Isle of Man almost 3 years ago.<br />
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Also today we went for a nice walk around Fairhaven Lake. It was getting dark and cold by the time we were ready to come home but it was nice to get out the house for a bit and into the fresh air. I would post pictures but for some reason it won't let me.<br />
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I know i have been making very short posts recently, by the time i get chance to sit down in the evening i'm so knackered i can't think straight to write anything of any lenght coherantly. Your all in for a treat though as i have a big post brewing about people not respecting me, my opinions and the way i wish to raise my kids. Bet you can't wait.Manic Mummyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09357463785561776972noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8102452242028757373.post-66306411666950133452011-01-01T21:44:00.000+00:002011-01-01T21:44:07.910+00:00Almost had an orgasm at the petrol stationwhen i pulled in behind this beauty.<br />
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</div><div align="left" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div align="left">Good job hubby was with me to pump the fuel as i was way to busy drooling.</div>Manic Mummyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09357463785561776972noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8102452242028757373.post-72486883881872075282011-01-01T14:27:00.000+00:002011-01-01T14:27:08.719+00:00Conversations with toddlersMidnight the other night as i was nipping to the loo Munch sat bolt upright in bed and we ended up having this conversation.<br />
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Munch - Mummy whats that noise?<br />
Mummy - It's the boiler.<br />
Munch - Whats the boiler mummy?<br />
Mummy - It lives in that cupboard and it makes our water hot for washing our hands, having baths, doing dishes, and making the raidiators hot to keep us warm.<br />
Munch - Hows it work mummy?<br />
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at which point i was like WTF <img alt=":ermm:" class="bbc_emoticon" src="http://www.justjaneys.co.uk/tmc/public/style_emoticons/default/ermm.gif" /> really wasn't expecting to try and explain electronics and plubing to my toddler especilly in the middle of the night. But i gave it my best shot..<br />
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Mummy - Well the cold water comes into the boiler by a pipe and a little flame makes it nice and hot and then it goes out by another pipe.<br />
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as i am saying this i am realiseing this doesn't make much sence, how can that little piolet light flame heat ALL out hot water. Unfortunatly Munch seems to have picked up on this too...<br />
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Munch - Never mind mummy, i ask Grandad. Grandad knows. <br />
well she asked Grandad last night, and he said it's like a big kettle. To which Munch responded, no grandad kettle in there! (points to kitchen) How BOILER work (points upstairs). My dad explained to her (and me) the best he could. I understand a bit better not sure how much of it she actually took in but she seemed happy enough and didn't ask anymore questions.Manic Mummyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09357463785561776972noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8102452242028757373.post-42336202438577112692011-01-01T14:22:00.000+00:002011-01-01T14:22:14.233+00:00Happy New Year<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiCGDT4zbA55Rbv2_HanTwSOS63FDcQQiiF3Pw7Xb5lQj80bkbRVxM0um0IfvRcLACBdDmk21dHRdbpEGPfnnynprpGDHNN1YwUiGmuHpIVeaDyADjUEgrx9OV6cvDT6OOtoSDL7FcQ9-Hu/s1600/images.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" n4="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiCGDT4zbA55Rbv2_HanTwSOS63FDcQQiiF3Pw7Xb5lQj80bkbRVxM0um0IfvRcLACBdDmk21dHRdbpEGPfnnynprpGDHNN1YwUiGmuHpIVeaDyADjUEgrx9OV6cvDT6OOtoSDL7FcQ9-Hu/s1600/images.jpg" /></a></div>Happy New Year to everyone and i hope 2011 brings you much joy and happiness.Manic Mummyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09357463785561776972noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8102452242028757373.post-84563358833483988362010-12-29T19:27:00.001+00:002010-12-29T19:28:47.762+00:00Not posted in agggeeeessssWe have been really busy what with Christmas and all, but i guess thats kind of been going around a bit. I hope everyone had a lovely Christmas. Ours was good, i got my Camera, the best slippers ever, Choccies, James Blunt's new album, Theory of a Deadman album, Inception, Beauty and the Beast and Eclipse to name but a few. The kids were throughly spoilt and one end of our living room looks like a toy factory. To be honest i'm not sure how much i like it, some of it will probably end up barely played with and i know they can't possibly appriciate the shear volume of stuff they recieved. Next year i think i will make a strict list and ask everyone to pick one thing off it, if they want to spend more then put the additional money in their bank account.<br />
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The day itself was good, we went to my mum's for dinner and although it was nice to spend the day with the extended family it was so hard work and so stressful getting them up, opening presents, getting everyone dressed and there for a set time. The morning ended up feeling a bit like a conveyer belt and next year i'm thinking we might stay at home and hopefully have a bit more of a relaxed day.<br />
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I have been very busy since Christmas taking hundreds of pictures on my camera and am really excited of starting my 365 project next year. Also have a number of possibilities on the horizon of directions in which to take my life, but undicided on what to do. Hoping for my depression to lift soon so that i can start throughly enjoying my life and my kids again.Manic Mummyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09357463785561776972noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8102452242028757373.post-33523356354575714152010-12-22T19:44:00.000+00:002010-12-22T19:44:00.238+00:00Busy, busy, busyI haven't updated here for days nor have i had chance to look at the other blogs i follow as i have just been so busy. Last night the hubby and i were up till 1am wrapping the pressies. Then today my mum had the girls so we could go and get a few last things from the trafford centre. I only needed a bear from build a bear factory for Pudding and while i was there picked up a memory card for my new camera as the one i ordered off amazon has had it's delivery date put back till after chriatmas and i don't want to get my new camera on christmas morning and then not be able to use it. The hubby on the other hand had to get a few things for me as being a typical man left it until the last minute.<br />
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Tomorrow i'm having my mummy friends over for the afternoon and then on Friday were back to Manchester to go to Chill Factore to see Santa.<br />
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Will hopefully update more tomorrow but now i'm off for some tea a nice relax in the bath and then bed as i'm knackered.Manic Mummyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09357463785561776972noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8102452242028757373.post-38781624002914851162010-12-18T20:06:00.000+00:002010-12-18T20:06:41.315+00:00Snow!!!!Well we FINALLY got the long anticipated snow. It started at about 5:30pm last night and went on until gone 2am. It put me in such a Christmassy mood that i put all our Christmas Deccies up, hence how i know it was still snowing at 2am. Then today we nipped to Mothercare for a few things this morning and then went sledging this afternoon. It's funny because the seldge we are using used to my mine and my brothers when i was about 8, which would make it a good 17 years old! Stop doing the math in your head.<br />
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Anyway today as i don't have anything prolific to say, i though i would share some pictures with you of our decorations and sledging activities. Enjoy!<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgq5wIpp5Tt0IqOV9TGfP2Ikp2i0guAI4jbFUPyfTgY4CAlgzKge3rPw5Wt4BVoE40AoGQSzAXwfZQYUZ3bhTE86RxVDKMSnlznbkb621BXvjexuXYD_ic0KPpTSN6G-GPlFBJD_JbEIGIo/s1600/DSCF2723.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" n4="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgq5wIpp5Tt0IqOV9TGfP2Ikp2i0guAI4jbFUPyfTgY4CAlgzKge3rPw5Wt4BVoE40AoGQSzAXwfZQYUZ3bhTE86RxVDKMSnlznbkb621BXvjexuXYD_ic0KPpTSN6G-GPlFBJD_JbEIGIo/s320/DSCF2723.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>Manic Mummyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09357463785561776972noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8102452242028757373.post-89420961320747714172010-12-16T22:10:00.000+00:002010-12-16T22:10:27.876+00:00The Gallery Week 39 - Sparkle<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-jwjTlcr7YrrG6XGpwOWbezgo-B8-ZqL35WupXUM9gR504OK0bYP6jBOZDowXISbHVu2rG_v7T3nUi7k4bl57yzfYa89WZo6tEmEPf1lk6wlo77HjA7fW9t6EKTDSKOZ0pmyH5AjMPcSq/s1600/The+Gallery.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" n4="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-jwjTlcr7YrrG6XGpwOWbezgo-B8-ZqL35WupXUM9gR504OK0bYP6jBOZDowXISbHVu2rG_v7T3nUi7k4bl57yzfYa89WZo6tEmEPf1lk6wlo77HjA7fW9t6EKTDSKOZ0pmyH5AjMPcSq/s200/The+Gallery.jpg" width="193" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">My entry for this week (late as it is) is one of the snowflake window decorations Munch and I made the other day. It's not a particularly good picture, nor will it mean much to anyone else. But when i look at it i remember our afternoon painting, gluing and glittering in the kitchen and the talking and lauging. The glitter which i'm still finding now and the pride on Munch's face every time she sees them in the window and says 'Mummy I MADE those.'</div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWPZZFWFUbhBlR0DTk4J2stnDreKEk0jwfJoUtG9tdwWUWSCzW2Oju_Vufpu8vkjoJsmSW9WeKwNItz_uJ407D_W-n7zlyeZ90G5i-1uFdGaSkUXUSOS6b99-C-fKuxukW4xWdlhJ_VxYM/s1600/DSCF2697.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" n4="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWPZZFWFUbhBlR0DTk4J2stnDreKEk0jwfJoUtG9tdwWUWSCzW2Oju_Vufpu8vkjoJsmSW9WeKwNItz_uJ407D_W-n7zlyeZ90G5i-1uFdGaSkUXUSOS6b99-C-fKuxukW4xWdlhJ_VxYM/s320/DSCF2697.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>Manic Mummyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09357463785561776972noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8102452242028757373.post-2548925353498207922010-12-16T21:25:00.000+00:002010-12-16T21:25:50.633+00:00Christmas night outI had the much anticipated Christmas night out last night. Thankfully the wardrobe crisis wasn't as bad as i had initially feared, but getting to the point of actually getting ready was more stressful than first imagined. Munch came home from Playschool Christmas party with conjunctivitis and i had to get in touch with the Dr's then wait for a call back to see if they wanted to see her, which they didn't but i had to whizz up there to get a prescription for her, which meant i wasn't getting in the shower until 5pm and was supposed to be doing the first pick-up at 5:30pm. Luckily everyone was running behind too and they were all very understanding (not that they had much choice seen as i was driving.) I got ready and managed to find everyone's houses ok and had us all at the venue for 7pm. Which wasn't to bad considering.<br />
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It was a really good night, the food wasn't fantastic but the master of ceremonies was brilliant. My only complaint was that the music was too loud while we were eating as it was difficult to hold a conversation. The downside to the night for me was that non of my friends wanted to get up and dance really. One danced for around 15mins then about 45 mins later on and another danced for about 15 mins towards the end so i spent a good portion of the night dancing by myself. I tried to dance near other groups so i didn't look too much like a loon, not entirely sure i succeeded though. It snowed at midnight on the dance floor and one guy who had taken a bit of a liking to me kept throwing the snow (polystyrene balls) over my head and seemed to be seeing how many he could get down the front of my top.<br />
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I didn't get home until 1:40am and my feet are still hurting me now from all that dancing in heels!<br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">I apologise for the bad quality my camera on my phone isn't great. I also don't feature in any as i was doing the snapping, the others did take some so hopefully i will get some of me soon.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">I also had my first BSL exam tonight which was nerve wracking. I'm terrible in situations like that, i get myself so worked up over it. In the end it wasn't to bad. I did manage to spell the tutors name wrong and have to do it again, and confused her with my direction giving. But other than that it was ok, i was mostly finding i wanted to say stuff but didn't know the signs to say it which was frustrating but never mind, hopefully we will learn them after Christmas. Fingers crossed that i passed.</div>Manic Mummyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09357463785561776972noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8102452242028757373.post-743201686463206232010-12-13T23:00:00.000+00:002010-12-13T23:00:47.102+00:00Nothing to wearThose of you who know me at all, will know i hate clothes shopping and what i hate even more is clothes shopping with my mum. I hate clothes shopping because not many places do the sort of clothes i actually like, i'm not one of those people who knows what co-ordinates well with what, i don't enjoy clothes enough to make the stress of searching for that perfect outfit worthwhile and i hate crouds, It gives me panic attacks to be in a crouded shop with hundreds of other people. I particularly don't like shopping with my mum as she would like me to be girly and wear all these pretty clothes ect and that really isn't me and i always feel like i am letting her down and she would prefer it if i was someone differant.<br />
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Anyway i had to brave clothes shopping with my mum as i'm out for a christmas night out with my friends on Wednesday and didn't really have anything to wear. Three hours later and hundreds of combinations later i came away with a big fat NOTHING. I guess i am just going to have to try and create an outfit out of something i already have. Which i can see now will result in lots of stress before the night out and quite possibly a few tears. (whether mine or the hubbys will remain to be seen!) I really think i just lack some of the female genes.<br />
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But my mum and i did go out for a nice meal afterwards and had a nice chat and shared some memories. We also managed not to argue once, the whole evening. Which is quite possibly some sort of record for us i think.Manic Mummyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09357463785561776972noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8102452242028757373.post-11626156719433639342010-12-12T19:25:00.000+00:002010-12-12T19:25:16.234+00:00Working mum'sNow i'm not and never have been a working mum. If you are then all power to you, if it works for you and it's what you want or need to do then thats great. I am never going to be able to work full time due to the Bi-polar and even if i could get a part time job there are certain situations i have aviod as i would put myself in danger of another relapse. But even if this wern't the case i wouldn't want to work full time as i want to be with my children and we also want to homeschool, working would mean we would be unable to do this as effectivly as we want to.<br />
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Yet everyone seems intent on me getting a job, if not now then in the future. So far this week i have had 3 people suggest carrears for me including a TA in a deaf school and Baker in a Supermarket chain. I have even been asked why i am doing a course in BSL if i don't want a career out of it. Why can't people get their heads around that i am unable work now, and at this point in time i don't want to have to work in the future unless we need the money. I am doing the course for me, because it is something i am interested in and enjoy doing and enjoy sharing with my children.<br />
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There is so much pressure on women these days to look after our children perfectly, have a wonderful clean and tidy house, make plently of homecooked meals from scratch and have a wonderful career. Why does this need to be the case? Fair enough to work if we need the money, or if it is what you want to do, but we shouldn't feel under pressure to comply to others ideals of what we should be. We need to slow down take a step back and decide what is important to us and do that, instead of filling our lives with needless stuff and unecissary problems.Manic Mummyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09357463785561776972noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8102452242028757373.post-45132122535580586902010-12-11T21:06:00.000+00:002010-12-11T21:06:04.202+00:00Night OutLast night the hubby and i got a night out sans kids. It wasn't anything fancy, we just went to the cinema to see the new Harry Potter film (well 3 week old Harry Potter Film). I enjoyed it but had the same complaint as i did with the others, it's not as good as the book. In fact there has only ever been 1 film that i have felt has been as good as the book and that was Anne Rice's Interview with the Vampire.<br />
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To be honest i wasn't really looking forward to it. It had been a very long hard day, i had a banging headache and by the time i washed all the glue, paint and glitter from our decoration and card making afternoon off my body and out of my hair. All i really felt like doing was climbing into a comfy pair of jamas and veging out on the sofa. But as we finaly had found a babysitter and had already bought the tickets i dragged myself out and enjoyed it once i was there and had injested several painkillers.<br />
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I have to say the loss of sponteneity is the thing i miss most since having the girls. In the pre-kid days we could just drop everything to go out for tea or to see a movie. When we first lived together we went to Pizza Hut and then on the the cinema about 3 times a week (not the healthiest of lifestyles). Now it takes so much time just to get out the front door, it's like packing for an expedition. Nappies, wipes, nappy sacks, spare vest and babygro for Pudding, clean knickers and spare pants for Munch, bibs, bibs and more bibs for Pudding reflux, suncream, calpol, dummies, drinks, snacks, bottle, bowls, spoon, food. Thats before i even start sorting myself out. It takes me half an hour from starting to get ready to actually everone being cliped into the car and being ready to go. Some days i do wonder if it's worth the hassle, and if i wouldn't be better staying at home. It's not even just getting to the car then the car journey with 'Mummy...mummy...mummy...'every 5 seconds then shouting Pudding who then cries, tell Munch off who then cries, everything settles down only for Munch to sout Pudding again at the top of her voice. Once you get there i have to get the buggy out the boot bundle them both into it, before repeating the whole process on the way home. Don't get me wrong i love my kids and love going out and having new experiences with them just sometime feels like a lot of hard work just getting to enjoy these things. Manic Mummyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09357463785561776972noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8102452242028757373.post-36504348111705554192010-12-09T22:19:00.000+00:002010-12-09T22:19:07.806+00:00A poo fright and a complimentI have been feeling depressed for the last few weeks or so and today the general crappiness of me was compounded by the fact i apeear to be getting Munch and Pudding's cold. It has been one of those days where everything feels like a struggle from the minute i got up. I even crashed out for 10 mins this afternoon while Pudding had her nap, Munch was playing nicely and then said she needed a poo i meant to take her but i was just so exhusted i fell asleep. I awoke with a fright about 10 mins later when she was looking right in my face and saying 'mummy, what's this?' For one awful second i thought she had done a poo and was thrusting it in my face. Fortunatly it was just a bit of fluff!<br />
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Dragged myself out for signing tonight as it's our last class and chance to practice before the exam next week. Finally got my turn at my conversation with the teacher and although we went off at a tangent asking me something i was n't expecting and that i didn't know the sign for, i winged it and at the end of the talk she said i had been the best out of the class.<br />
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I was so chuffed with myself until my paranoid brain kicked in telling me that she was probably just saying it to bolster my confidence and make me feel better, or that she said it to everyone, or that after other people had a second go with her was i still the best? Why am i so incapable of just accepting a complement? Why do i have to second guess everything and put a negative spin on it when it is directed at me or something i have done?Manic Mummyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09357463785561776972noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8102452242028757373.post-43413110780688946772010-12-08T21:25:00.001+00:002010-12-08T23:08:11.684+00:00How can you lose a child twice in one day I hear you ask?First instance, i leave Munch watching Something Special on TV while i quickly nip upstairs to put the pudding down for her nap. When i come back down she is nowhere to be found, i searched the entire house checking all the doors, behind and under all the furniture for a good 5 mins to no avail. Getting frantic i also searched the garden knowing she does sometimes go out of the dog flap but i hadn't heard it swing this time. Hunted all around the garden shouting but still couldn't find her, came back inside researched all of downstairs when i happened to look out the window and the dog is stood dutifully at the bottom of the garden staring at the hedge not moving. I go out part the hedge and there is Munch stood squashed between the fence and the hedge grinning at me. I didn't even know it was possible to fit down there. But bless her she had put her snow boots on first and she came in saying "Mummy i been playing in the forest in the garden."<br />
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Second instance, Go to order the kids tea at the Hippodome this evening i get back to my seat and Munch has dissapeared again. Do a repeat performance of running around and shouting like a loon when a dad asks if i have checked the toilets as he thought he heard someone in the ladies when he took is son in. The toilet doors are really hevey so had never thought to check there. I was so proud of her really, she had needed a wee so taken herself to the toilet, looked for the ladies sign on the door so she got the right one done everything she needed to and when i got there she was just washing her hands. I was so proud of her, just wished she had told me first.<br />
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Other than having the fright of my life we had a good time this afternoon. I took loads of pictures but the majority of them were just blurs. Here is what i was left with<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyq9ii-AsqLxXmrHya6RPi00kbry_ttbDgUg80aX5kRskkv4oXp3EPuZpVdKfAlkX-t1QGlvps_BYw0Oyn8idpRp6IJvrG5GFit-fGuvdDt-4xdyZMpTjrByZiofyaBwwrYQzemQ2YmrEC/s1600/DSCF2652.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" n4="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyq9ii-AsqLxXmrHya6RPi00kbry_ttbDgUg80aX5kRskkv4oXp3EPuZpVdKfAlkX-t1QGlvps_BYw0Oyn8idpRp6IJvrG5GFit-fGuvdDt-4xdyZMpTjrByZiofyaBwwrYQzemQ2YmrEC/s320/DSCF2652.JPG" width="320" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCRii1hVbMucSrQ4qKwY5kBBR8_h90QLsyNVROimBZp59sHQWyCmh04Oq5227uzKyGTXhbODeQOWjwKn7oFiqlJir5KO3uT3omXE2hmtc3yPGafoW5YWsZuFBszzu3-dy90hzYEJj1Apmy/s1600/DSCF2654.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" n4="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCRii1hVbMucSrQ4qKwY5kBBR8_h90QLsyNVROimBZp59sHQWyCmh04Oq5227uzKyGTXhbODeQOWjwKn7oFiqlJir5KO3uT3omXE2hmtc3yPGafoW5YWsZuFBszzu3-dy90hzYEJj1Apmy/s320/DSCF2654.JPG" width="320" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEib5C8JcnjbjDM0T2iun-aEBZslrgRmn3NI4G_4SeNTirP6ximXeMd1tvk0EV17YCAWJbB_tzhxPQk7gAdc2Vvrmo6HqVyD68uJjKelly-j9wVYEKR7lpVdBBxP3u-cF3L6ubRFpSZqF_75/s1600/DSCF2666.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" n4="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEib5C8JcnjbjDM0T2iun-aEBZslrgRmn3NI4G_4SeNTirP6ximXeMd1tvk0EV17YCAWJbB_tzhxPQk7gAdc2Vvrmo6HqVyD68uJjKelly-j9wVYEKR7lpVdBBxP3u-cF3L6ubRFpSZqF_75/s320/DSCF2666.JPG" width="320" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj02g0Rq1GAz2HW9_soMksiDRBD4pOksmC5NevIaHTThHA8hrIf2yNJTvjepGg_qbFXvw5fKZwh4XVBSTsaEjMpwme03MsUv7mNwu5J7BHXkbx2VdcMc8To81yW09wssB8g55-Sq8Eajorv/s1600/DSCF2692.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" n4="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj02g0Rq1GAz2HW9_soMksiDRBD4pOksmC5NevIaHTThHA8hrIf2yNJTvjepGg_qbFXvw5fKZwh4XVBSTsaEjMpwme03MsUv7mNwu5J7BHXkbx2VdcMc8To81yW09wssB8g55-Sq8Eajorv/s320/DSCF2692.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>Manic Mummyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09357463785561776972noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8102452242028757373.post-57486707132364215702010-12-07T21:22:00.001+00:002010-12-07T21:23:29.900+00:00Craft suppliesAfter a fairly lazy morning involving an unexpected vist we set off this afternoon on the search for craft supplies. Fortunatly we didn't have to search too far as there is a Hobbycraft 20 minutes away. We came away with paint, glitter, card, snowflake cutouts, pom poms and googly eyes.<br />
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Were going to have a bash at the girls making their own Christmas cards for close family members, so expect some pictures in the next couple of days. Also going to have a go at making some Christmas deccies, using the snowflake cutouts and painting them. I'm toying with the idea of making my own cards using the wintery pictures i have taken but wondering if it's a bit late in the day to try and be so ambitions with everything else i have to do. Maybe an idea for next year, will hopefully have a bigger supply of better quality pictures thanks to my christmas pressent<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrtbGBepnqDrNN1r3XOYa5yWmj3Ofm_h1JsBRUZdu68tKbqR3Phw-Hx6XAePfw7T77kXLOidlxZl42jWowJzn7dIFsfkNi9njJIEfy5bdIQMIBUFXZbgMyItM4OpMsIxymXUf8JB4VV89J/s1600/canon-eos-500-d.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="176" ox="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrtbGBepnqDrNN1r3XOYa5yWmj3Ofm_h1JsBRUZdu68tKbqR3Phw-Hx6XAePfw7T77kXLOidlxZl42jWowJzn7dIFsfkNi9njJIEfy5bdIQMIBUFXZbgMyItM4OpMsIxymXUf8JB4VV89J/s200/canon-eos-500-d.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Cannon EOS 500D</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div style="text-align: left;"> Also for next year i would really like to make like a garland of advent stockings and in each one put a part of the nativity story. The girls both have wooden advent calendars which have sweets in (well Pudding's doesn't this year but will next year.) Although we are not Christians i want to bring the girls up knowing what it is the we are actually celebrating at Christmas and that it's not just all about presents.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">I also had to stop myself for buying some lovely wool with the intention of knitting some cosy socks with it. I am already in the process of knitting a scarf for my MIL birthday, a knitted farmyard for the girls and a jumper for munch. I am very much an ideas person, i can come with hundrends of good ideas but never have the time to actually implement them.</div>Manic Mummyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09357463785561776972noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8102452242028757373.post-91209406654150376772010-12-07T21:04:00.002+00:002010-12-07T21:06:06.916+00:00The Gallery Week 38 - White<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8y-meCMBUovjPIqUgP1nIP7eilsWM1Y0S9Wp4-SUowPL9UrD8LKRgQ8zwvECg_T31AKGSXWS5OSQxaDKijKIiZDFVtQSc-8-uNjKHCVJVfYtnFeQGhwtCZLBeeqqVe7xyQz44xlyfAz4g/s1600/The+Gallery.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" ox="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8y-meCMBUovjPIqUgP1nIP7eilsWM1Y0S9Wp4-SUowPL9UrD8LKRgQ8zwvECg_T31AKGSXWS5OSQxaDKijKIiZDFVtQSc-8-uNjKHCVJVfYtnFeQGhwtCZLBeeqqVe7xyQz44xlyfAz4g/s200/The+Gallery.jpg" width="194" /></a></div><div align="center"></div><br />
Last year my best friend had the wedding of her dreams, a true white wedding. Unfortunatly i can't find the picture i really want to use of my friend and her new husband stood out in the snow. But have one of the grounds where the wedding took place.<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZAzRXbD588SzjEDNaJmnBih_UODqlEv6Q5SKsG0dhyphenhyphenh2hD8Q48vISnkXMp6YxdtLzThe9E56l8rSWm8v2wtu4uQDfDPk8DvF3bpDh2Wcu5uCDm4QjGnjH_coSXc-hcu5cKvoNNBPCpqE-/s1600/DSCF1647.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" ox="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZAzRXbD588SzjEDNaJmnBih_UODqlEv6Q5SKsG0dhyphenhyphenh2hD8Q48vISnkXMp6YxdtLzThe9E56l8rSWm8v2wtu4uQDfDPk8DvF3bpDh2Wcu5uCDm4QjGnjH_coSXc-hcu5cKvoNNBPCpqE-/s400/DSCF1647.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>Manic Mummyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09357463785561776972noreply@blogger.com3